


September Holidays

by tittysatan



Category: Friends at the Table (Podcast)
Genre: Chatlogs, Family Drama, Found Family, Gen, Mild Language, Overbearing Parents, Pre-Canon, Season: COUNTER/Weight
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-31
Updated: 2021-01-31
Packaged: 2021-03-18 12:08:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,847
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29118015
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tittysatan/pseuds/tittysatan
Summary: Lazer Ted's parents are coming to visit for the holidays, and you know Mako isn't about to miss THAT mess. It just...doesn't quite turn out to be the kind of mess he expected.
Relationships: Lazer Ted & Mako Trig
Comments: 1
Kudos: 3





	September Holidays

**Author's Note:**

  * For [PolExists](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=PolExists).



It was sleeting in Mode City.

Well, “sleet” was probably the closest word for it. September’s dense, gelatinous rain was half-frozen, thudding wetly into the ground, battering the umbrellas of those unfortunate enough to be outside, echoing on the roof of the Bacchus Biotech Recreational Dome like a very enthusiastic and untalented drummer. The roads and walkways were walled in where longsuffering maintenance robots had plowed the slush aside to freeze into icy barricades.

There was a reason people didn’t stay on September over the holidays. If you could go home to family, you went.

That said, most of House Rose Moon -- Mako Trig included -- did not have family to go home to. It was common enough that it didn’t really bother him. He made plans with friends instead, going offworld or at least out of town to anywhere less miserable. It was normal. He’d never known anything else.

And maybe sometimes Mako would turn on the TV to see some cheesy EarthHome movie with everyone smiling in the warm light, small soft snowflakes falling outside the window, and turn it off again. Maybe sometimes a friend would start talking about their holiday plans, and the apologetic expressions they had when they caught themselves were worse than whatever they’d been about to say. Maybe sometimes he’d see someone showing their parents around, huddled under an umbrella, excited voices carrying even through the storms, and turn away.

And that was normal too, and easy enough to forget about when he was with other people in the same boat as him, who he didn’t have to explain himself to.

This year, though, Mako wasn’t going anywhere. It just hadn’t quite happened, between desperately cramming for finals and running up _way_ more a tab playing gatcha games than he’d expected. Well, no, he had expected it. He just also expected to be able to hack the server before he actually had to pay, but it turned out their security was actually handled by some September Institute alumni, and that was how he got suspended. It was very, _very_ dumb.

So it was less that Mako didn’t have anywhere to go, and more that he wasn’t allowed to go anywhere. He’d made plans with Tower Chalet, too. They were gonna go to _JoyPark_. It was gonna be _fun_. But _nooooo_ , instead of being on a nice sunny planet with a cute boy he was stuck _here_ , on _September_ , which had _the worst winter weather in the known universe_. 

...okay, maybe that was a bit strong. But Mako was still pretty annoyed about the whole thing. He was lying on his back on the floor of his dorm room, legs up on the edge of his bed, being annoyed about it, when he got a message notification through the Mesh. 

WavyLaze: yo mako whas happenin  
WavyLaze: u on campus rite  
TrigWarning: I mean yeah?  
TrigWarning: wait are YOU on campus  
TrigWarning: why didn’t you say something we should hang  
WavyLaze: didnt say nuthin cuz i got plans already  
WavyLaze: plans dun got made for me  
WavyLaze: i aint happy bout it neither  
WavyLaze: but mako   
WavyLaze: i need u to do me a solid mako  
WavyLaze: do u got  
WavyLaze: a necktie  
TrigWarning: ...like to wear?  
WavyLaze: yeah boi like to wear  
TrigWarning: no I super don’t   
TrigWarning: idk why you’d think I would tbh?  
WavyLaze: hey man i don know ur life  
WavyLaze: we all got hidden depths  
WavyLaze: maybe those depths got a necktie  
WavyLaze: u got a bowtie?  
TrigWarning: also no. even more no  
TrigWarning: don’t you know someone at the suit place in the mall?  
WavyLaze: yeah but is closed  
WavyLaze: for the holidays  
WavyLaze: he outta town  
WavyLaze: u my only hope mako  
TrigWarning: uhh my roomie might have a necktie…? lemme check  
TrigWarning: why do you need one anyways  
TrigWarning: what’re these Plans, is there a hustle  
TrigWarning: and do you need backup, I am SO bored  
WavyLaze: no hustle this time  
WavyLaze: my folks visitin  
WavyLaze: gotta look sharp yknow

Mako paused in the middle of rummaging through his roommate’s closet, frowning at the handful of neckties.

TrigWarning: your PARENTS???  
TrigWarning: omg do they know what the WEATHER is like here  
TrigWarning: and they expect you to wear-- no right you’re white star  
TrigWarning: literally incapable of remembering that you are house frickin white star

It wasn’t like Mako had anything against White Star folks, but for the most part, they did just kinda keep to themselves. Networking or whatever. And yeah, some of them were cool, but they weren’t, y’know, _wavy_. Absolutely not the house anyone would peg Ted in, but apparently his parents disagreed.

WavyLaze: yeah they  
WavyLaze: they somethin  
TrigWarning: can I meet them?  
WavyLaze: aw HELL naw  
TrigWarning: c’mon, I’ll be good! I can do manners  
WavyLaze: you don even gots a necktie  
TrigWarning: I can wear my uniform  
TrigWarning: and I can borrow you one of my roomie’s ties  
TrigWarning: I’m helping you out here  
TrigWarning: seriously you have no idea how bored I am rn  
WavyLaze: naw is naw mako  
TrigWarning: I’ll buy you bud light  
WavyLaze: ull buy me bud lite?  
TrigWarning: ted, I will buy you a case of bud light  
WavyLaze: well  
WavyLaze: aight  
WavyLaze: but like don make this a thing  
TrigWarning: I solemnly swear I will not make this a thing

It wasn’t that Mako was planning on making it a thing, he thought as he dug his uniform out from the bottom of a drawer where he’d shoved it after orientation. He was just open to the possibility that it might become a thing. Like, it was _Lazer Ted_. Mako was dying to know what his White Star-ass, necktie-wearing parents were like. He was dying to know what Ted was like _around_ his parents. That was fair, right? They might not sound like they had much in common with Ted, and he might not sound that psyched to see them, but they were still his _parents_. Mako had never really, like, been around parents before. 

He kept thinking of all those stupid EarthHome cliches -- opening presents together, sitting around a table loaded with food, drinking mulled wine and talking and you feel safe and warm and loved -- and imagining himself there in them. Which was stupid. He knew it was stupid.

He was just going to give Ted a bit of a hard time. Just cause he was bored, and it’d be funny. That was all.

Mako was looking about as proper as he ever did when he stepped out into the awful slush-rain to meet Ted. Everything was a little wrinkled, and his umbrella didn’t keep the cuffs of his trousers from getting soaked as he made the short, miserable run from his dorm to the Student Affairs building where he was meeting Ted, but hey, at least he was in trousers. 

The lobby was mostly empty when he got there, no Ted in sight. He was in the process of scraping the awful wet sludge off his pants when someone came up to him. “...yo, Mako.”

Mako did a double-take. And then a triple. And then a quadruple. 

He had wondered what Ted looked like under the lazer (sic) cornrows and the holo-grill and the recursive video shades, but he never thought he’d actually _see_ it. He looked _exactly_ like every shitty stereotype other houses had about White Stars. It looked _deliberate_. “Holy shit, Ted, you look-- I didn’t even _recognize--_ Holy _shit!”_

“You said you wasn’t gon’ make this a thing, homie,” Ted said.

“How am I supposed to not make this a thing when you look all…” was about as far as Mako got before he realized Ted had his arms crossed and shoulders hunched and couldn’t meet his eyes, and that was _way_ more jarring than his appearance. Ted was _never_ uncomfortable. Even when he probably should be.

“Oh, uh, yeah,” Mako said. “I was just, y’know, surprised.”

“I said my folks is somethin’. You got that tie?”

“Yeah, here,” he said, pulling it out from where he’d tucked it under his sweater. “Mostly kept it out of the rain.”

“Thanks man,” Ted said, almost looking like himself for a moment as he grinned and gave Mako a fist bump before taking the tie and putting it on, motions smooth and practiced.

“So why don’t you have any of your own ties?” Mako asked. “Y’know, if your parents are like that.”

“Oh, I did,” Ted said, tightening the knot around his neck and smoothing his hair -- his normal human hair, he was _blonde_ \-- back, something strange and sharp in his eyes as he looked at Mako. “Got rid of ‘em soon as I came here. Ain’t _never_ liked these things.”

“I mean, fair.” It wasn’t as though Mako liked doing the whole dressing up thing either -- he couldn’t imagine having parents that expected it of him. He couldn’t really imagine having parents at all, though, so maybe it was normal. What did he know. “So why’re they here anyways? Don’t you usually go visit them? I mean, I assume that’s where you’ve been going over the holidays for the past few years.”

“Yeah, tha’s right,” Ted said. “Woulda preferred that, but they was all wantin’ to see the place they been sendin’ me.”

“Oh my god, you think they’re gonna wanna see your dorm room?”

“Prolly! I done shoved most of my stuff outta sight just in case. Like, it was already _outta sight_ , but now is also literally outta sight.” And again, one of those flashes of normal Ted (and how wild was it that the Ted with the lazer (sic) cornrows was the “normal” one?) that somehow only made this whole thing more disconcerting. Mako was starting to wonder if this was a mistake. This felt like seeing something he wasn’t supposed to see. Like walking in on Ted naked or something, except he’d actually done that once and Ted had just asked if he liked the view. He wasn’t supposed to _act_ like this, this wasn’t _him_.

“Ted, are you sure you--”

“Aw shit they here,” Ted said under his breath as two people entered the Student Services Center from the direction of the main entrance, and if Mako thought _Ted_ looked White Star… 

The man was tall and broad-shouldered, imposing in a three-piece suit and cravat, all perfectly arranged grey hair and sharp lined features. He did not have either a monocle or a walking stick, but he looked like he should. The woman was just as striking, stilettos echoing on the tile floor as she walked, her dress a color that Mako could only see as blood. 

They were very obviously Ted’s parents.

“Theo!” his mother said, sweeping in with arms open and pulling Ted into a hug he mostly managed not to shrink back from. “It’s wonderful to see you again, dear.”

 _Theo!?_ Mako narrowly managed to stop himself from exclaiming.

“It’s great to see you too, mother, father,” said Ted-- _Theo--_ with a smile that wavered around the corners. “How was the trip? I’m so sorry about the weather, but I did warn you about September this time of year…”

Mako was having an out-of-body experience. The person standing in front of him, with the suit and necktie and neat hair, making small talk with his parents in _perfect grammatical English_ \-- this was not Ted. At least, not any Ted that Mako knew. Or particularly wanted to know. 

He was snapped back to reality by Ted’s father saying “And who might you be?” while running a clearly very judgmental eye over his rumpled, damp, necktie-less clothes.

“Oh, this is my friend and classmate, Mako Trig,” Ted said, which was good, because Mako wasn’t sure he could get a coherent sentence out with how rattled he was. “He heard you were coming to visit and said he wanted to meet you; I hope that’s alright?”

“Yes, of course…” Ted’s mother said, looking him up and down, hesitating for just a moment before offering Mako a hand and a smile. “Melinda Horst; it’s a pleasure. I take it you’re a fellow member of House White Star?”

Mako had thought he mostly had it together before he was blindsided again by Horst. _Horst_. God, no wonder Ted never used his last name. “Uh. No. I’m Rose Moon.” He shook her hand, gesturing vaguely at the pink and grey of his clothes with his free hand. “Hence the, y’know, Rose Moon colors.”

“...I see,” Melinda said, dropping his hand with a smile that made it pretty clear she wished her son wasn’t associating with the likes of him.

“Theodore Horst,” Ted’s father said with a curt nod. Theodore. Theo. Ted. Ted was a _junior_. “Now son, we were hoping you-- and your _friend--_ could show us around?”

Inside his brain, Mako opened a chat client.

TrigWarning: okay ted no offense or anything but what the fuck  
TrigWarning: I don’t even… what IS this???  
WavyLaze: i tol you they my folks

Meanwhile, _Theo_ was showing said folks the visible Mesh overlay and explaining how it worked. The code-switching was pretty impressive, actually.

TrigWarning: yeah but like…  
TrigWarning: is this you???  
TrigWarning: that’s a stupid question you’re clearly even more uncomfortable than I am rn  
TrigWarning: so why are you acting like some preppy white star cliche???  
WavyLaze: they my FOLKS  
TrigWarning: SO???

“So the way the Mesh appears here is more or less how Strati perceive it,” Ted said. “It’s a layer of virtual reality overlapping the physical world, which we can access directly through our minds instead of having to use a device. It’s a way more direct and intuitive kind of connection.”

“I see,” said Melinda, nodding expressionlessly. “And what exactly is it _good_ for?”

WavyLaze: i cant jus   
WavyLaze: i don know man  
WavyLaze: they aint bad or nuthin  
TrigWarning: no offense but are you sure  
TrigWarning: look at yourself rn  
TrigWarning: I literally did not recognize you  
TrigWarning: you look like you wanna crawl out of your skin  
TrigWarning: and you’re doing this for THEM???

“All sorts of stuff!” Ted said, and for a moment his smile seemed genuine. “Hacking, for sure, that’s a lot of why this place was founded, but the stuff you can do with it for music and art is really--”

“Theo, please,” his father interrupted him with a hand. “You’re not in House _EarthHome_.”

“...Blue Earth,” Mako muttered under his breath.

WavyLaze: i mean they all proper an shit!  
WavyLaze: howm i sposed to go wavy laze in front a them?  
TrigWarning: THE SAME WAY YOU DO IN FRONT OF EVERYONE ELSE!!!  
TrigWarning: they’re your PARENTS!   
TrigWarning: parents aren’t supposed to act like this!  
TrigWarning: aren’t they supposed to love and accept you for who you are and stuff???  
WavyLaze: lmao  
WavyLaze: lmaoooo  
WavyLaze: welcome to house white star homie

“I’m sure the _artistic applications--_ ” Theodore said it like it was a disease “--are very impressive, and I’m sure the students in House Blue Earth--” his eyes snapped to Mako, then away “--find this curriculum very relevant to their career prospects. However, I fail to see how it is relevant to yours.”

TrigWarning: well it’s stupid  
TrigWarning: they don’t even KNOW you, they don’t know anything about you  
TrigWarning: what Career Prospects are they even talking about  
WavyLaze: they diplomats  
WavyLaze: they want me to be a diplomat  
TrigWarning: are you shitting me  
WavyLaze: yeah I hella aint about it  
TrigWarning: then why don’t you just TELL them that???

“Well, there’s al--” Ted cut off mid-word with a choked noise, staring wide-eyed at nothing, entire body visibly tense, before closing his eyes and exhaling forcibly. “R-right, sorry. That’s...yeah.”

TrigWarning: you okay bro???  
WavyLaze: NO  
WavyLaze: that shit aint cool mako  
TrigWarning: I’m sorry I didn’t think you were gonna  
TrigWarning: like  
TrigWarning: panic? Is panic the word?  
WavyLaze: i don know man  
WavyLaze: but naw i cant just tell em that  
WavyLaze: cant even THINK bout that shit

“We know you’ve always found that sort of thing very interesting,” Melinda said, smile patronizing, “but we agreed to send you here so that you could make connections that would be valuable for your future, not so that you could indulge your hobbies.”

TrigWarning: okay but do you see my point though  
TrigWarning: that doesn’t seem good  
TrigWarning: that you’re SO freaked out at the thought  
WavyLaze: i mean  
TrigWarning: do you like these people?  
WavyLaze: they my folks

“I’ve been making connections too,” Ted said, unable to look at them, somewhere between defensive and desperate.

“Is that so?” Theodore asked. “With whom? I’d be fascinated to hear -- I can only assume their names are ones I’d recognize.”

TrigWarning: yeah but do you like them  
TrigWarning: do you wanna see them  
TrigWarning: cause tbh they seem like they don’t wanna see you  
TrigWarning: like the real you not whatever image you’re trying to project  
TrigWarning: are you happy you’re here in a necktie  
TrigWarning: getting negged by them  
TrigWarning: instead of idk getting smashed and jamming with me  
TrigWarning: we could’ve made some beats ted  
TrigWarning: do you actually wanna be doing this  
WavyLaze: naw man i hella dont  
WavyLaze: but i gotta  
TrigWarning: NO YOU DON’T THAT’S WHAT I’M TRYING TO SAY

Ted didn’t say anything.

“Yes, that’s what I thought,” Theodore said.

“Your father’s right, Theo,” Melinda said. “You need to start considering your future more seriously.”

TrigWarning: I don’t have parents and lemme tell you I have definitely been weird about that!  
TrigWarning: but seeing you like this is making me HAPPY I don’t!!!  
TrigWarning: you’re just pretending to be someone you’re not cause you’re scared they’ll  
TrigWarning: tbh idk what you’re scared of  
TrigWarning: but if you really think they’ll do something that bad if you’re honest then why put up with them at all???  
TrigWarning: if this is what it’s like having family I don’t want it  
TrigWarning: and I don’t get why you would either  
TrigWarning: it’s BULLSHIT

“To be honest, we don’t know that the September Institute is the right fit for you,” she said, still smiling that same stupid patronizing smile. “It’s not… I would never say it’s a _bad influence_ , but maybe just not as good of an influence as it could be.”

“There’s a small diplomatic academy on Kesh that one of my colleagues at the embassy recommended,” Theodore said. “She sent her children there, and they’re all very accomplished.”

“Her eldest is spokesperson for Oricon on Counter/Weight,” Melinda said, nodding.

TrigWarning: fuck  
TrigWarning: if they make you transfer I’m gonna punch them  
TrigWarning: if you LET them transfer you I’m gonna punch YOU  
WavyLaze: shit  
WavyLaze: shit man  
WavyLaze: they don even got CLUBS on kesh  
WavyLaze: like REAL clubs  
WavyLaze: wherem i sposed to dj huh  
TrigWarning: think about it ted  
TrigWarning: they don’t even have lasers 

“I’m sure we could arrange--” 

“Why’re you here?” Ted interrupted Theodore.

“Theodore Christian Horst the Third!” Melinda said, scandalized, and oh god he wasn’t a junior, he was a _the third_. “You do _not_ speak to your father that way!”

“Did you wanna see me, or did you just wanna lecture me?” Ted said, fists clenched.

TrigWarning: oh shit  
WavyLaze: i think im boutta hurl

“Of course we wanted to see you, Theo,” Melinda said, putting a hand on his arm, “but--”

“Sorry I ain’t the kid you wanted, aight!?” Ted said, shrugging the hand away and moving back to stand next to Mako. “But all this shit--” he gestured at himself, his pressed dress shirt and slacks and neatly combed hair “--this ain’t me!”

TrigWarning: FUCK EM UPPPPP  
WavyLaze: aw fuck i dun did it now  
WavyLaze: aint no goin back

Ted’s parents were both staring in shock as Ted pulled the necktie roughly off and lifted his arm to throw it on the ground, only for Mako to stop him in a fluster. “Aw shit, yeah, this ya boy’s,” Ted said under his breath, handing him the tie.

“Thanks.”

“S’cool.” He turned back to his parents. “It ain’t _Theo!_ It ain’t _Theodore Christian Horst the Third!_ Is _Lazer Ted_ , with a _Z_ , thas the name on _all_ my albums, cause I make _dope music_ with my _dope brain computer powers_ , and thas just how it be! C’mon Mako, we _out!_ ” He pivoted 180 degrees and walked off, leaving his parents still in shock. Mako gave them his shit-eatingest grin and an exaggerated shrug before turning and jogging after him.

“Holy shit Ted, that was _amazing_ ,” he said as soon as they were outside the building, barely even noticing the sleet pounding them. He’d forgotten his umbrella on the way out, but he was _definitely_ not going back to get it.

“I’m gon' be sick,” Ted said, staring in the middle distance. “Like, I’m already _sick_ , but if we don' dip before they come lookin I’m straight gon' hurl.”

“C’mon, we can hide in my room,” Mako said, taking him by the arm and pulling him into the shadow of another building and away. “I know a good way there. And you really think they’re going out in this weather?”

“Naw, they ain’t,” Ted said with a dry laugh. “An I done blocked they numbers already, else you _know_ they be callin… Shit, man, can’t believe I done _did_ that.”

“How’s it feel?” Mako asked, grinning at him. 

“Terrifyin,” Ted said. 

“And?”

“An _dope_.”

“Man, I can’t think bout this shit right now,” Ted said, shivering and dripping on the floor in Mako’s dorm room. “Ya boy needs a _shower_. An summa that _Bud Lite_.”

“You can go first,” Mako said, also shivering and dripping on the floor. “I think you need it more.”

“Aw, we ain’t sharin?”

Mako blinked, then burst out laughing. “Now _that’s_ the Ted I know! For real though, get in the shower before you get hypothermia or something.”

“Aight, I see how it is, we have some Buds and see how the night goes,” Ted said, nodding to himself as he went into the bathroom. “You change your mind, though, I ain’t locking that door.”

While Ted was in the shower, Mako pulled off his soaked, half-frozen clothes and toweled himself down, putting on a pair of boxers and curling up in a heated blanket, sighing happily as feeling started to return to his toes.

So. That was not an EarthHome holiday, now was it. What with Ted practically disowning himself and all. But that was the thing, wasn’t it? Ted’s parents trying so hard to force him into some idea of what he was supposed to be -- what _family_ was supposed to be -- that the whole thing fell apart. 

Mako wondered if he’d act the same if he had parents -- nah, no way.

But he didn’t mind that he didn’t.

Him and Ted would get warmed up, drink some Bud Light, snack on whatever Mako’s roommate left in the fridge, watch some dumb movies, make some beats -- and y’know what, that sounded like a pretty good way to spend the holidays.


End file.
